Only six days to go and it will be ou first anniversary. Happy? No. I could feel the fakeness of the moment. He couldn't even say that he love me. And just this afternoon when I went to visit him at his house, I saw a picture, a sketch and a note with her name scribbled on it with a song written at the back. I asked him what were those all about and he just replied that that was already a long time ago. But I wonder why are those things on his table. Still all he would say was that it was already a long time ago and he would ignore my further questioning. I just kept quiet to avoid arguments.
I spent the whole afternoon with him and that might be the last time that we're together. I was planning to give him space to think and to realize what's going on with our relationship. I wouldn't show up for two weeks and I hope that I can manage to go on with my life without him. I'll just show myself up the night before his birthday which is a Friday (I can't see him on the day of his birthday because it is a weekend). Or I might not show up at all, I will just leave a gift to his house along with the letters he had given me. I don't want to keep them, it just hurts reading them. I was also hoping that if he gets the chance to read them again, they would knock him out of his senses and made him realize more what had happened. After all, it was all his fault again. I did well enough on my part, but again I wasn't enough.
Maybe it's really best to let things go..In time I can call you a friend. Just a friend.
Posted at 11:28 pm by
stainedmirror
